Archive for May, 2007
May 17, 2007 · Filed under Technology
Is it odd that the first productive thought I had once I got to work this morning was, “Wow! New 
Google interface!” Worse yet, I then sat and reflected on how one of the great things about Web Applications is that deploying a new version to your customer base doesn’t require any action on the user’s part.
Obviously, this is why Bill Gates determined in the early 90’s that this whole Internet thing wasn’t going to go anywhere. No painful, expensive, hardware-upgrade-requiring, error-prone installation for the users to blow their weekend on. I mean, where’s the fun in that?
For those who care, he said, “The Internet? We are not interested in it.” in 1993. And, because I can’t resist, he also said, in response to Java, “Anybody who thinks a little 9,000-line program that’s distributed free and can be cloned by anyone is going to affect anything we do at Microsoft has his head screwed on wrong.” A real fortune-teller, that one.
May 15, 2007 · Filed under Entertainment, Technology
When we moved to Seattle from North Carolina, we were forced to switch from TimeWarner digital cable service to Comcast. 
With this change came an unexpected - unwelcome - surprise. Comcast was using DV-R software and an online guide built by Microsoft - and they wouldn’t let us forget it with the little icon at the upper-right of the screen that said, “Microsoft Enhanced“.
Basically, what “Microsoft Enhanced” means is that consumers will be able to bring all the unreliability and frustration of using a Windows PC to their television-watching experience.
I, for one, have always felt slighted when I wasn’t required to reboot my cable box every few hours to clear up any glitches or wasn’t left wondering why my TV’s online guide had suddenly frozen - only to unfreeze and unleash all the buffered keystrokes it had absorbed in the meantime while I was trying to figure out why the cable box wasn’t responding. Really. It made me feel unneeded. Needless to say, we were delighted to have this “convenience” available to us any time we were trying to unwind.
But, Comcast announced on Monday it would drop the Microsoft product and switch to it’s own software. That sounds like a Microsoft Enhanced bitch-slapping to me.
My favorite “feature” was the fact that if the DV-R finished recording a program while I was watching another recorded program, it would crash and give me the television-equivalent of the blue screen of death: static.
In all honesty, though, I will miss being able to smugly reply with, “Well, because it’s Microsoft Enhanced.” anytime Michelle says something like, “Wait, what just happened?” or, “Wait, where’d the menu go?” or, “Wait, why did it just do that?”
Why? Because it’s Microsoft Enhanced.
May 15, 2007 · Filed under Cycling, Photo Album
Some of you may have noticed KRX-10’s comment on my earlier post regarding Sabotage. Well, needless to say, I was
overjoyed to see the pictures he provided of the “sabotage” incident. I’m sure it’s lost on no one that his joke is based on the fact that I’m an American citizen of direct Dutch decent and because of me, the American Discovery Channel cycling team lost one of its key riders during the 2006 Tour de France - a perfect example of “the ancient Dutch art of screwing up your own team.”
Well, there’s some background to this story that deserves to be told. Michelle and I have twice been to France (in 2003 and 2006) to ride and follow the Tour when it comes near the area we stay in Aspet, France. This has been a truly exciting experience both times, and we have memories from both trips that will stay with us for ever.
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May 14, 2007 · Filed under Technology
Sometimes when I use a product, I find myself thinking that perhaps the designer of the product didn’t thoroughly 
consider how the user would be using it. Other times, I feel like I’m the unwitting victim of some inside-joke between the product designer and the rest of the world - and perhaps the designer isn’t a big fan of me.
None of this is the case with Microsoft. In this case, I know. I know Microsoft has me, the end-user, in mind when designing their product. In fact, I strongly get the idea that Microsoft hates my guts. The hatred that Microsoft has for me is so complete, in fact, that they are willing to go to considerable lengths to ensure I spend my precious weekends fighting with the the most indescribable and illogical problems. These are not simply flaws in their products; the only way some of these problems can exist is through dedicated and devoted planning on how to make their products do the most idiotic things at the worst possible moment.
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May 11, 2007 · Filed under Dutch, Entertainment
Come on. What’s the deal with all the Dutch hammering? Huh? Rainn Wilson, who plays Dwight Schrute on The Office
has disparaged the Dutch. And here I thought he was a good kid from Seattle with a heart of gold, a dream - and integrity. But I guess not. I guess he’s just like everyone else. We were spending a nice evening eating gratin dauphinoise, enjoying a nice bottle of French wine, and watching The Office. It was nice. Perhaps a little too nice. Suddenly, out of nowhere, Dwight made the following statement:
Sabotage: The ancient Dutch art of screwing up your own team.
It still hurts. It cut deep. Real deep.
Isn’t Sabotage a French word?
This painful stab comes on the heels of my good friend Tim telling me about the arrogant purple duck on Peep and the Big Wide World who “…talks incessantly about ‘Duck intelligence this, Duck strength that…’ - he’s like the Dutch.”
OK. I get it.
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